Unseen No More: The Magic of Midlife Visibility
I was in line to check in the supermarket with my older helping me put everything on the counter, my baby strapped to the cart with her chubby toddler fingers reaching for something behind her, while my middle was having a full-blown tantrum. She wanted something and I had said no. Her tenaciousness is now an amazing quality but back then tested every ounce of my already- lacking patience.
I remember wanting to disappear. I was wearing yoga pants and a v-neck t-shirt and Toms. A common uniform that ensured I looked clean year yet instantly forgotten. I didn’t care to stand out in any way but cared SO much that my children looked beautiful with their matching bows on their hair, nails trimmed to perfection and preppy clothes with collars and buttons. I wanted them to be healthy, polite, smart, and a reflection of my parenting.
And still, I failed. I was homeschooling and I remember a woman behind me asking me why they weren’t in school. As I explained, I could feel her judgement and her response of “How will they learn to stand in line?”, given that we WERE in line, left me dumbfounded.
I realized that day that no matter what I did right as a mom, I would always be judged by what others thought I did wrong. And since I can’t please everyone, I might as well, not give a damn and do ME.
I stated dressing how I wanted, letting my hair go curly, let my kids dress themselves more, and loosened control on so many things. I wanted them (and me!) to just be HAPPY, confident in themselves, and free of my judgement, since the world had plenty already.
Over time, I decided to put myself in front of the camera, be the face of my brand and really embrace aging, growing a business, gaining or losing weight, and even parenting teenagers, on social media. This decade-long practice had meant that I have reached 47 knowing who I am, not hiding, and being proud of being seen. I hope you can feel some of this in my work and through my brand, it has been cathartic, and I think it has made me bolder and a better advocate for moms, and women in general that come in front of my lens.
baci