9 STEPS TO RECONNECT WITH YOURSELF
AND RE- ALIGN YOUR LIFE
“Who looks outside dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”
START WITH ASSESSMENT, through KISS
I love the idea that in order to create change, we begin by assessing where we are. Once day, I came across this concept to do that. In this case, KISS is not the acronym we are used to seeing, here’s what it is…
K- KEEP: Think about what in your life is working and you want to keep, whether it is in your routine, your people, etc.
I- INSPIRED: What or who inspires you? This can often lead you add/ remove practices in your life
S- STOP: Figure out something you want to stop doing in your life that is not serving you.
S- START: Think of something you want to start doing that aligns with your goals/ values.
PRACTICE GRATITUDE
We have all heard this before, but the reason why we hear it all the time is that (in MY experience)- it works! It resets your mind from a place of lack, to a place of abundance because you are focused on the positive!
Try to think of 3 things every morning and evening for things you are grateful for, feel them as you think of them. Honestly, sometimes, for me it’s coffee, my bed, and a/c (this is Texas after all!). I tried doing it in writing, but the reality is that I get busy, so now I do it mentally, before I get out of bed and as I lie down for the night. Figure out a way that works for you so this becomes a part of how you start and end your day.
REKINDLE OLD INTERESTS AND HOBBIES
Remember when you were a child/ teenager/ young adult and there was a few things you loved and filled you up? That was your SOUL guiding you!
Write a list of those hobbies or interests that gave you joy before you got too busy or grown up for it. Pick one and reconnect with that! It will be scary, maybe out of your confront zone but that is the point! Doing new things keeps our brain young and reinvigorates our life! Once you do, you may want to pick another… I played tennis in High school and getting back on the court over the pandemic is the best thing I’ve done in my 40s!
GET OUTSIDE
As Americans (specially in Texas), we live inside so much but making an effort to be outside, even for 5 minutes reduces cortisol levels, muscle tension, and demands on our cardiovascular systems (lowers heart rate and blood pressure).
Look up to sky for a minute, to help us remember how small we are so we can happily give up control over the aspects of our lives that stress us out. Then, look down, to connect with the earth that you are made from. Breathe.
SCHEDULE ME TIME
This idea is adapted from the book The Artist’s Way, by Julia Cameron. She suggests we schedule a creative date for 2 hours with ourselves ever week.
I love this because it means we have to PLAN time for ourselves, and this can be anything- go to the movies, get your nails done, have lunch with someone you love, read a book on the hammock, go to yoga, garden. Pick something that fills you up or that you never make time for and SCHEDULE it- put it in your calendar and block it off. Sometimes for me, its Friday afternoon, or Saturday morning before everyone wakes up.
UNPLUG
According to the New York Times, we should all hit the reset button in your brain. “Turns out, activating your “mind-wandering mode,” zoning out or simply daydreaming is a necessary and vital part of creativity and productivity.”
This may be one of the hardest and you may require help (phone addiction is real!). Decide on a good time to do this. Daily or weekly, set a goal of time you want to plug and tell a loved one your goal or install an app (I love Opal) that restricts time/ apps so that you can achieve that goal. Do this as a practice, until it is easier and you don’t need help. I have found the most beneficial (and most difficult time) for me is the first hour of the morning. You may find it to be different for you.
BE YOUR OWN HYPE GIRL
Less likely to be critical of themselves and less likely to be anxious and depressed, which, in turn, leads to greater life satisfaction. There is evidence that the words you say to yourself could change the way you see yourself but not only that, how you address yourself matters too. Saying your NAME when you are talking to yourself has been found to have self- regulatory effects.
So play that Lizzo and hype yourself up!! Tell yourself that you are beautiful, smart, organized, driven, etc- embrace your flaws as things that make you unique and remember your goals and tell yourself you WILL achieve them! Speak to yourself how you would speak to your best friend.
INVEST IN PERSONAL GROWTH
Research found that individuals who participate in self-growth measures are less likely to experience burnout. This will look different for each of us.
Hire a coach, take a cooking lesson, enroll in a community college class, hire a personal trainer, etc. Find an area of your life that you are looking to improve and invest in it. Don’t look at it as an expense, because it will pay off in joy, fulfillment and feeling re-energized.
CELEBRATE ACHIEVEMENTS
This is a BIG one. You do so much. You set your goals, worked hard and probably don’t stop to recognize your own achievements and milestones. This is important for future goals and day to day efforts.
Think of things you like that you have not done in awhile and schedule that as a celebration. Take yourself and a friend or partner out to a special meal/ weekend or event, buy yourself flowers, a dress, or a new rug you had your eye on; the point is that you are celebrating your efforts- YOU DID IT!